What To Do When You Feel Beyond Furious

Relief From Anger Management Counseling Will Only Start Once You Seek Mental Help

If you’re already receiving anger management counseling by choice, that means you’re eager to learn how to manage your anger most of the time. Hence, you may be going to every session religiously.

A poster of a shouting and infuriated woman, emphasized by the red colors
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Management Anger Counseling

The counselor may not even need to prompt you to speak up, whether during interpersonal or group therapy. Perhaps you don’t forget any homework as well and genuinely use the calming techniques taught by the therapist in your daily life.

However, regardless of how much you attempt to manage your anger, sometimes the problem still seeks you. There may be circumstances, for that reason, wherein you forget the teachings from therapy and get close to blowing up. “Anger can be expressed either directly through “lashing out” or indirectly through “passive-aggressive” behavior. With passive-aggressive behavior, individuals punish others by being belligerent, not responding, pouting, or simply running away.” Ben Martin, Psy.D. elaborates.

Experiencing anger too often can jeopardize your management program and bring you back to square one, you know. So, what should you do when you’re so angry that you can’t manage to do anything?

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  1. Don’t Hide It

The first management tip to try is venting out your anger as soon as you feel angry. You should not conceal anger for longer than a few hours because it may resemble a dormant volcano that can flare up anytime. It is also quite disadvantageous for you to carry a heavy heart all the time, while others remain oblivious of your dark emotion.

  1. Move

Rage can be an excellent source of motivation to exercise as well. Instead of exerting effort to go on a shouting match with someone or break stuff, push yourself to run, swim, or do squats. You may even start dancing or weightlifting if that’s your jam, but never stay still when you’re super angry. That’s the key to avoiding regretful actions, frankly speaking.

  1. Retreat

Assuming you have a physical condition that prevents you from exercising, another thing you can do is step away from the scene. Leave the room immediately and don’t even contemplate about re-entering it unless you’re confident that your anger won’t blow up in everyone’s faces. Remember, “Mindfulness for Anger Management puts mindfulness into action with transformative skills and real strategies for overcoming anger and taking control of powerful emotions.” Stephen Dansiger PsyD MFT said.

Nobody can call you a coward for doing so. You are merely trying to save people from feeling your wrath. This way, once the strong emotion fades, you may return to the room without hurting anyone either verbally or non-verbally.

  1. Pause Before You Speak

When you’re beyond furious, the sudden adrenaline rush can keep you from looking at the big picture.  Your only goal at that second is to think of a response to whatever someone said quickly. You no longer bother to reflect on how your words will make others feel later.

In case the truth hasn’t set in yet, you should realize that such behavior is the ultimate relationship-breaker. It’s impossible to retain people in your life like that, especially when your rage turns you into an inconsiderate human being. What may foil that is waiting for several beats before speaking so that you won’t accidentally say things you don’t mean.

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In Summary

Whether you’re getting anger management counseling or not, there will genuinely be times when you’ll lose your sanity and do something rash out of rage. That’s human nature, and even the folks who meditate often can have such raw moments. What’s entirely unacceptable, however, is not trying to limit or lessen those outbursts since they can be burdensome for others, as well as for your health. Roya R. Rad, MA, PsyD suggests that you “give yourself permission to do some serious emotional healing to become your happiest self and remember, it is a process more than a destination.”

Don’t be afraid to ask for psychological help if the tips above are insufficient to curb the temptation to act like a madman(or woman). Visit a counseling platform or a facility near you soon. Good luck!

Here’s How Online Marriage Counseling Helps With Money Matters

While infidelity is the most prevalent cause of marriage breakdowns, many couples get eaten up by the elephant in the room, something that couples don’t always talk about but eventually consume them – money. It’s tough to find two people who quickly get along with financial matters. When couples don’t get to agree on this for a prolonged period, they drift apart.

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What Is Online Marriage Counseling?

Online marriage counseling has been found to be very helpful for couples who wish to be proactive in finding solutions to their marriage problems and money issues are not exceptions to these. “Even better, these insights and skills that you’ll gain from marriage counseling and couples therapy can have great and lasting benefits in your other relationships, including in your relationships with colleagues, children, and other family members.” Julie Williams, Psy.D. said. Financial therapy is easily gaining recall among married couples who want to deal with their economic differences. Here are ways by which online counselors could help:


Online Marriage Counseling Can Give Appropriate Financial Advice

The good thing about online marriage counselors is that they provide a third person point of view regarding your financial problems. Many marriage counselors specialize in marital issues involving finances. They offer a fresh perspective which would help both of you realize what things you can improve on to solve your money problems. They could teach you financial discipline and better planning.

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They Help Couples Understand Each Other’s Money Personalities

Couples have different personalities. One may be a risk-taker while the other is risk averse, one may be a “budget person” while the other may be spontaneous, or one can be lavish while the other can be very thrifty. Counselors can help you pinpoint these characteristics so that upon knowing where your partner is coming from, you are better able to discuss your spending habits. Counselors lead the way to open communication.


They Encourage Couples To Be Financially Faithful

Often taken for granted, financial infidelity is the build-up of all those little lies which you considered too petty. It includes that time you went grocery shopping but the bill went beyond budget, and you don’t tell it to your spouse, among others. Counselors can pave the way for a conversation for you to let go of the dirty little secrets and start confiding with each other about all your financial decisions.


They Get You To Work On (And Stick To) A Budget

Having a budget is the best way to keep track of your expenses. More so, it allows you to discover your real spending habits. Perhaps you will be surprised that you are spending more than what you think you do. Only then would you be able to control your spending habits better. Counselors can guide you through a comprehensive budget plan, with tips on how to stick with it depending on your lifestyle and goals.

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They Guide You Towards The Same Goals

“Humans are complex and all of us experience emotions like anger and sadness, so it’s very normal that at some point in the relationship, you will disagree with your partner.” Maryann W. Mathai, LPCC, LMHC, LPC, NCC explains. Counselors can offer some workshop wherein you get to align your financial goals as a couple, and you would also be able to categorize them into what you wish to achieve in the near and distant future. Methods like this are the more flexible and exciting part of budgeting wherein you have the chance to incorporate what you want to achieve based on how you define financial stability. This kind of approach puts both of you on the same page, allowing you to work as a team.


Like any other marital issue, finances can break relationships apart, but it is not something that is impossible to overcome. Online marriage therapy or counseling is just one of the many ways by which couples could start addressing their marriage concerns. “Participating together as a couple gives the partners the opportunity to pay closer attention to one another and listen more intimately to their needs, wants, and dissatisfactions, thus establishing a closer bond and a more intimate connection.” says Dana Baduna, PhD, LMFT. To know more about how it can help, you can also learn about it here: https://www.betterhelp.com/advice/relations/benefits-of-online-couple-counseling/.


If it’s already your marriage life at stake, remember never to hesitate to take all the help you can get as it can aid in improving your relationship.



How To Deal With Financial Stress As Told By Financial Therapy Expert

Financial problems must always be taken seriously because they can turn your world upside down. The failure to resolve these issues as soon as possible can lead to more significant trouble. Most of the time, people who are not good at handling stress about money matters end up being bankrupt. Once this happens, the adverse effects will have a domino effect. It is as if the problems will never end because bankruptcy can give rise to more pressing concerns. Guidance from financial therapy specialist may help lessen the stressful situation.

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Continue reading “How To Deal With Financial Stress As Told By Financial Therapy Expert”

Tips To Overcome Marital Stress

Are you married? Do you know how you can overcome marital stress? Can marriage conflicts still be resolved? Can conflict in marriage be managed? If your mind is filled with questions like these, learn about the possible answers below.

Marriage is a commitment between two people to love and respect each other until the day they die. However, when life gets in the way, and the couple disagrees, it can also become a very stressful union. Marital stress is one of the reasons why a married couple experiences troubles, and it may be the bridge to their ultimate separation or divorce.

Man and woman wearing couple rings, not talking to each other
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Marriage has its advantages and disadvantages, but a couple can survive the trials if they still have love in their hearts, and they learn to compromise with each other.

(Online therapy for couples can also help. Check BetterHelp for more details.)

Anyway, for learning purposes, here are some causes for stress in marriage:

Common Causes Of Stress Among Wedded Couples


Having a family can be costly, and it is a major financial adjustment for both husband and wife. Additional financial obligations may arise which will eventually cause marital stress on married couples. The couple should sit down and talk about their budgets if they want to fix the problem. Of course, they must also agree to not fight about money which will be difficult. Jason B. Whiting, PhD, LMFT explains that “Many referred to financial limitations, and these were often connected to caring for children: “I had no family, two young children, no money, and guilt because he had brain damage from a car accident.” Others were unable to keep jobs because of the abuser’s control or their injuries, and others were used financially by their abuser: “[My] ex racked up thousands of debt in my name.”


Mom and dad looking at their son, having parenting problems
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Most married couples feel stressed due to parenting. It’s not an easy task to be a mother or a father. Anyway, they have to talk about how many kids they are planning to have. Married couples also have to talk about when they must start having kids, how they will bring all of them up, and so on. Problems between couples that initiate with the children include differing views on parenting, when one of the two blames the other for the bad things happening to their child, and more. This often leads to marital stress as well.

There are also instances wherein a married couple has to deal with traumatic experiences. Jor-El Caraballo, LMHC said, “Relationships in and of themselves do not create mental illness.” However, he adds, “When we suffer in our relationships, it can be difficult to move forward from past hurt and trauma.” It includes losing a child, having a child with special conditions and so much more. Such would become an additional stress to them and will eventually cause tension and stress. However, married couples can overcome this if they learn to accept and support one another during these hard times. It is a lot of work and effort, but if they want to make it, they will find a way.


A scarcity of marital time due to work commitments is another stressor in marriage. A huge percentage of couples these days are involved in the workforce, thus, they have less time at home to be with their family. Being at work eight to twelve hours a day will eventually tire a person, and this will disable them to interact with their family. Tension, stress, and loneliness occur in the household if there is no work-life balance.

Challenging Behaviors

Due to stress at work, marital trauma or relationship issues, a person can become very irritable and unreasonable at times. It will make the person so stressful to deal with, and then, it will cause tension between the couple. Worse is, some would get into drinking, infidelity, gambling and self-medicating. It will only make things worse for the couple. In times like this, the couple should find time to talk and sort out their personal issues.


Changes can occur over time. Never expect things to be the same forever. Usually, these changes shock the other person and could cause strain between the two. However, such can be avoided if one or both of them will adapt to the changes. Instead of resisting it, try to analyze, understand and even accept the idea for the good of the relationship.

How Can Wedded Couples’ Stress Be Managed?

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You Have To Have An Open Communication

Talking and listening to one another always helps. Couples just have to be open and honest during this process, and they should also apply respect when communicating with one another. By doing this, they will fully understand each other and minimize stressful encounters. (Online therapy may also help.) Dr. Chantal Gagnon PhD LMHC expresses that”Often, one or both partners can begin to feel they have married the wrong person. Much of this can be avoided with in-depth premarital therapy.” So, it’s an option.

You Have To Be More Attentive To Each Other’s Needs

Giving the other that much-needed attention will help eliminate the stress. What is once a week date night or a few minutes of talking each day? It will ignite intimacy and add love points to your marriage book.

You Have To Stay Together

Spending time with each other will allow the couple to bond and nurture their relationship. With this, communication lines and understanding will be open between the two, and whatever problem comes their way, it will be repaired.

Why Group Therapy Is Better Than One-On-One

Was there a time you heard about psychotherapy and became curious about it? Ever considered the idea of attending one? The benefits are promising, especially if you get the therapy that suits you well. The good thing is it is available in a wide array of options, one of which is group therapy. 

In a group therapy session, a therapist works with several individuals simultaneously. Some therapies demand active participation from individuals to easily form a bond that can help improve the quality of the sessions.

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What Are The Types Of Group Therapy?

There are different variations of group therapy depending on what you need. Its types include the following:

    • Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Groups

This type of therapy group focuses on redirecting your thinking patterns, analyzing your emotions, and realizing how these manifest in your behavior.

    • Support Groups

Support groups establish a rapport with people who go through the same situation as you. Its main goal is to create relationships amongst the members and boost up one another.

    • Skills Development Group

In this therapy, the aim is to develop social skills for individuals battling mental disorders or developmental disabilities.

    • Psychoeducational Group

Lastly, this type of therapy focuses on empowering members with information about their conditions. These can help them take actions towards their betterment. 

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In addition to the abovementioned groups, therapy sessions may be closed or open. The former is strictly for the members; no new participants are anticipated to attend. Meanwhile, the latter accepts anyone who wants to join at any time.

What Happens In A Group Therapy?

Group therapies are conducted regularly. Members, together with the leading psychiatrist, meet weekly for a specific duration. A session lasts for an hour or two. Sometimes, a few members are required to attend one-on-one meetings as well. 

Group therapy sessions may differ depending on the therapist’s style. Some therapists encourage participation more than listening. They follow a free-form flow for the therapy session. On the other hand, others plan how the discussions will run. Meanwhile, some therapists require members to develop a new skill. 

However, there are some things you can always expect to happen during group therapy. Here are the stages a therapy group goes through:

    • Forming stage

During this stage, group members introduce themselves to each other. They share and listen to stories as well. It is also expected for the therapist to orient the members on the flow of the therapy and the rules within the group. Most concerns are raised during this period.

    • Transition stage

The goal of the therapist in the transition stage is to gain the trust of the members. Since this is the transitioning period, some have yet to be comfortable. They can be reluctant to share or participate. 

    • Norming

At this stage, therapists expect the members to develop cohesiveness. By this time, they should have already familiarised themselves with each other. They should also be completely aware of the flow of the sessions. 

    • Performing stage

With the established rapport after going through the previous stages, members are now expected to feel comfortable. They can now freely express themselves. Growth and productivity are prevalent in this stage.

    • Adjourning

The name of the stage says it all; it marks the end of the sessions. Members, together with their therapists, look back and discuss how the group therapy helped them. The therapist also shares what they noticed about your individual and group growth. 

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Why Should You Consider Attending Group Therapy Over A One-on-One Session

Group therapies can be very beneficial. Along with proper medication, it can be very helpful to people suffering from different conditions such as:

    • Depression
    • Eating disorders
    • Anxiety disorders
    • Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
    • Substance use disorder
    • Anger management
    • Stress management
    • Chronic illness

Group therapies are also advisable for people experiencing challenging life events like divorce, domestic violence, grief, and loss. 

Unlike individual therapies, you get to mingle with other people. So, you get to see the world from different perspectives. Their stories can help you find purpose and appreciate the beauty of life. You learn not just from your own experience but theirs as well.

From group therapies, you get to have support and encouragement not only from your therapist but from the people who go through the same battles as you. By actively listening, you’ll realize that in this world, you are not alone. Furthermore, group therapy enables members to gain confidence. People lacking in communication and social skills may learn from their experience within their group. 

Another pro when it comes to group therapy is that it is usually less expensive than an individual session with a therapist. Since the therapist no longer devotes a specific time for each client, group therapies are often more affordable. 

But before engaging in group therapy, you must get a doctor’s recommendation. Based on your condition, you will be assessed on whether or not you are a great candidate for this type of therapy. It would help if you also put into consideration your preference. Since you will be participating in a group, it is expected that you would interact with other people and be okay with sharing what you are going through.

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Wrapping Up

Remember the old saying, no man is an island? It may seem a bit cheesy, but it holds especially true for people going through tough times. If you are going through a rough patch yourself, consider joining a group therapy session near you. It will never hurt to surround yourself with people who understand what you’re going through. 

You may be uncomfortable at first. But once you establish trust with your fellow therapy members, you will find the sessions more smooth sailing. You will be able to find a haven where you can share your thoughts and feelings. You might even find friends for life. Most importantly, you will find a group that will help you grow and develop as a person. 

Group Therapy: What To Expect

You might have already heard a thing or two about group therapy. Your friend may have casually mentioned it, or you’ve seen a few of them in movies. But, what exactly is group therapy? And why should you consider getting in one instead of doing the traditional one-on-one sessions?

What Is Group Therapy?

In general, group therapy is a type of psychotherapy consisting of five to twelve members, led by one or more psychologists. In this form of therapy, the members meet regularly to talk and listen to each other. The program is specific and is structured to achieve concrete goals. The group meets regularly from two to twelve months. Group therapy can be available in hospitals, mental health clinics, community centers, or private practices.

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Group therapy meetings can either be open or closed. The former allows new members to join the group at any time. On the other hand, in closed group sessions, all members begin simultaneously, and only they can attend the sessions. 

What Are The Types Of Group Therapy?

There are various types of group therapy, including: 

    • Psychoeducational Groups

This group session gives members an avenue to gain knowledge about their specific conditions. Led by a qualified therapist, the focus on the sessions is more on therapists providing valuable information and healthy coping skills. In this type of group therapy, relationships and bonds between group members are less important.

    • Skills Development Groups

This group type focuses on improving the social skills of people with mental disorders or developmental disabilities. It also aims to strengthen the member’s behavioral and cognitive resources and to cope abilities to help them with their condition.

    • Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Groups

One of the goals of CBT is to help you identify different ways your thoughts and emotions affect your actions. CBT support groups focus on restructuring your distorted thoughts that lead to harmful actions. The whole session is based on the techniques and benefits of CBT. 

    • Support Groups

While support groups may not be considered therapy groups, they still offer a lot of benefits. The structure of a support group is somewhat similar to group therapy sessions as well. It focuses more on developing relationships and confidence between group members. 

Support groups are also designed to bring together people who are going through the same or similar conditions. For instance, individuals with a certain illness may join a health-related support group for emotional support.

What Happens In Group Therapy?

    • Forming Stage

At this stage, the group members are still in the process of establishing expectations with one another. The therapist will lay out the rules and responsibilities of the participants, as well as theirs. Members can then introduce themselves. During this time, they share their reasons for joining the group therapy. 

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Matters of confidentiality and possible conflict shall be addressed at this point to avoid complications in future sessions. Also, therapists should deal with social and cultural concerns must during this stage.

    • Transition Stage

In the first few weeks of group therapy, anxiety, ambiguity, and conflict may still be prevalent. Everyone is still in the process of building and identifying the group norms. People may still be defensive and resistant, while others can be shy and fearful. The leading therapist will see that the transition period is on track and as pleasant as possible.

At this point, the therapist must have gained the trust and respect of the members. Slowly but surely, they will then guide members into sorting out differences and any personal reluctance.

    • Norming

At this point, members have already developed group-specific standards (cohesiveness). Everyone is familiar with the group dynamics and protocols in the event of a conflict. This is the stage where the group prepares for the major activities of the program.

    • Performing Stage

It is during this phase when individual growth and group productivity, and effectiveness occur. Members start to experiment with new ideas or behaviors. Egalitarianism also develops within the group. The therapist will guide members through activities using techniques and challenges that bring out the emotions and hidden thoughts.

By now, the members should have learned to be honest and open about their feelings. The sense of trust and confidence between members should be at its peak at the performing stage.

    • Adjourning

In the termination stage, closure for the group as a whole and as individual members is done. The group reflects on their experiences and decides how to use their newly acquired knowledge for their betterment.

The therapist also discusses and reviews the outcomes and achievements of the group. They recap what worked, the concerns that they solved, and newly arisen conflicts. If one member is also doing individual therapy, this is also the time where they will discuss the group therapy with their private therapist.

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What Are The Benefits Of Group Therapy?

While most people are more familiar with individual therapy and its benefits, group therapy has unique advantages. In particular, the diversity of group members can give people new perspectives and new strategies for maintaining good mental health. 

When implemented alongside individual therapy and medication, group therapy can help treat a variety of conditions, including:

    • Depression
    • Eating disorders
    • Anxiety disorders
    • Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
    • Substance use disorder
    • Anger management
    • Stress management
    • Chronic illness

There are also group therapies that cater to individuals going through challenging life events, such as: 

    • Divorce
    • Domestic violence
    • Grief and loss


The idea of going into a room and exposing yourself to a group of strangers can be terrifying. But once you get past that initial uneasiness, you will see that being in a group can be very helpful and fun. Handling Stress and anxiety will be much easier, knowing that you have a shoulder you can lean on.

With the stressful times we are in right now; it is nice to relate to us. It validates our issues, seeing that you are not the only one experiencing such challenges.  Being in a group gives you a sense of security and relief. So, don’t hesitate to join a group therapy session. Who knows? You might even form long-term relationships with members of your group.


What My Counselor Friend Told Me To Never Do Again For Love

I had always been fascinated by the idea of love. Because of that, when one of my classmates in middle school started courting me, I only gave him two weeks before I said yes. We dated for a few months, but we drifted apart right before high school because he needed to move to another city and did not want a long-distance thing.

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Although I was heartbroken, I decided to move on and look for another love. I eventually found it in a senior student in my school. This relationship was different because my boyfriend turned out to be sexually active and – surprise, surprise – lost my virginity to him.

While that boyfriend was great in the sack, I had to go of him because he kept on wanting to sleep with other girls. He might have done that – I did not care to investigate further – but I was glad that it was over.

In the next five years, I continued to look for love and always thought that the man I was with was “the one.” But more often than not, whenever I was really close to believing that a particular guy was my Prince Charming, he would turn out to be one of those dummies who knew how to dress and talk well.

After college, I thought I was way past players. Heck, I already went through my fair share of them; I was ready to settle down. That’s when I met Levy.

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Talk About Finding Gold…

Levy was not like all the other boyfriends I had. For one, he was ten years older than me, so I assumed that he was more than ready to settle down than any other guy around my age. He had made it in life as well, given his successful restaurant business. And if I was honest, he was hotter than the men in my past.

In hopes of speeding things up, I agreed to shack up with Levy when he suggested it. I had never lived with any of my exes until now, so I genuinely believed that Levy was THAT serious about our relationship.

Levy and I lived like typical honeymooners for a few blissful months, and I would wake up every day wondering, “Is this the day when he would propose to me?”

…And Getting Conned With Brass

Two years quickly passed, and I saw no sign of Levy asking me to marry him. Frustrated and drunk, I confronted him one day about it. I got the most brutal slap in the face (albeit metaphorically) when he told me that he was not ready to settle down yet. Levy even said, “We are enjoying our lives right now. Why do we need a piece of paper to bind us?”

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Levy’s statement was so wrong in so many ways that I did not bother to answer him. I just packed my clothes and left. The funny part was, Levy did not even bother to call me or look for me. It was another indication that he was only focused on having fun without the long-term commitment that I wanted.

Since my departure was unplanned, I did not manage to find an apartment at once. I went to the only other person who understood me: my best friend, who also happened to be a counselor. I have never done counseling in my life, but when I told her about what happened with my failed relationship, she told me a few things that I should never do for love again.

Turn Into A Yes Woman

The worst thing about my last relationship was that I wanted the man to love me so bad that I never said no to everything he wanted. When Levy asked me to live with him, I said yes. Whenever he told me he needed to go somewhere, I said sure. In return, I started to lose parts of my true self.

Keep Waiting To Realize My Love Goals 

Another issue was that I did not make my dream of settling down known from the beginning. In my defense, it was because I knew that marriage talks could be intimidating for guys, especially when you are a new couple. I also did not want to seem pushy or clingy in my man’s eyes, so I gave him enough time to develop the same goals.

However, I know now that I should have mentioned my end goal initially. If I did, I would’ve known that marriage was not in Levy’s plans before we even lived together.

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Look For Love

My best friend also advised me to stop looking for love. “Love becomes more elusive when you put so much effort in finding it. Let it come to you instead,” she said.

Final Thoughts

The reality was that I did not believe a single thing that my best friend said to me that day. I thought that all counselors like her were somewhat programmed to say something like that. But since she let me stay in her home, I decided to heed her tips and bided my time to get to know a man before going exclusive with him.

It took three years before love found me, but I would say that it was undoubtedly worth every minute I spent waiting for it.

Stress Management

I worked for pro mental health, which meant that we had an in-house psychologist who checked our mental health status twice a year. She would dish out a psychological evaluation in the form of questionnaires or interviews. They mainly were done to assess our satisfaction rate in terms of the benefits, workflow, etc.

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Landing Up To My Dream Job

During my first year as a junior marketing executive, I got top marks in all my psych exams. After all, I was happy with my new position. I was finally getting paid the amount that was appropriate for my work experience. You could say that my morale was so high that I could eat stress for breakfast and lunch and go home with a genuine smile on my face.

When the second year came, my happiness in satisfaction levels was much higher compared to the previous year. One of the senior marketing executives decided to have an early retirement, so there was an open position that promised better pay. Getting that post had been my goal in the last few months, so when I applied for it, and the bosses practically said it was meant for me, I was over the moon. Although my stress level went up a little, as the psychologist noted, there was nothing to worry about since it was still at the normal range.

What I failed to realize before I took on the new position was that it came with a lot of stress. Instead of needing to fend for me most of the time, I needed to handle at least five employees as a senior marketing executive. I thought that being one of the bosses meant that they would do most of the legwork, but I was wrong. Since it was a marketing job, I had to be as involved in a project as my employees were. But while they were only doing one project at a time, I was expected to oversee all of them at once, which was mentally and physically taxing.

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When I sat down with the psychologist for the first psych evaluation on my third year in the company, my stress level was over my head. The psychologist did not need to use her training to notice that; it was easy to tell based on how much makeup I caked on my face to hide the fact that I had massive and darker eye bags than usual.

The psychologist asked me how I was and how I felt, but I wasn’t going to answer anything other than fine. I did not want to sound ungrateful about my job because I was happy I had it. Because of it, I managed to move out of my crappy apartment and into a nice three-bedroom house within three years. I even paid off the rest of my parents’ home mortgage last Christmas, which made them very happy. Hence, the answer would always be, “I am fine.”

However, I forgot that the psychologist could see through me. She told me that I might have more things on my plate than I could handle. Though I insisted that I just needed a little sleep, she scribbled a telephone number and address on a piece of paper and instructed me to go there after work.

“What is this?” I asked, confused.

“That’s the address and number of the counselor that I always work with. If anyone can help you deal with your stressors, she can – trust me.”

I wanted to argue some more, but the next employee arrived, and I had to return to my office.

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Stress Got Me Unprepared

That afternoon, one of the new employees must up a project that we had been working on for two months. He thought rearranging the files for that alphabetical order without asking me was a good idea, but the process for that project was so tricky that we already arranged the files in a specific way. Putting everything back in the original order would set us back by at least two weeks.

Out of anger and frustration, I sacked the new guy immediately. I thought I would feel better after that, but I didn’t. When I felt like my head was about to explode due to worries running nonstop in there, I saw the slip of paper that the psychologist gave me. Out of options, I gave the counselor a call and agreed to meet her at 7:00 PM.

Getting Counseling – Stress Management

“Do you know why you are here?”

That’s the first question that came out of the counselor’s mouth as soon as I was comfortable in my chair in front of her desk. I went straight there from work since I was too stressed even to have dinner.

“Is it because of my stress?”

“Yes, that’s correct. Stress is your friend in the beginning as it pushes you to be alert. But when it goes overboard, you tend to fall apart right before everyone’s eyes, and you may not even be aware of it,” the counselor explained.

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Final Thoughts

I gained enlightenment from that first consultation. Even though I did not have a mental disorder, I realized that counseling and stress management could benefit everyone, especially those with high-stress levels like me. It served as a precautionary measure, considering I could have experienced a nervous breakdown if my stress overloads were prolonged.

I could not thank my psychologist enough for prescribing counseling to me.


Frequently Asked Questions About Phone Anxiety

When I talk about my phone anxiety to other people, they pretty much do not believe me. Usually, they start by asking, “Is that a phobia or something?” Honestly, I am not sure if that even exists. But to the knowledge that there is some weird stuff associated with a phobia, I thought maybe it is.

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My phone anxiety is not that easy to explain to everybody as they always begin to ask me questions related to phones, like literally everything about the device. But I say, it is not the device itself, but the function of it. I am afraid of phones because I don’t want to interact with other people over the device.

My anxiety makes me imagine a lot of negative things. Like, what if the person I’m talking to on the other line is already dead? Or what if I am not really talking to someone over the phone? Do you see these strange ideas in my head? It is because of my anxiety.

But sometimes, my imaginations are not that crazy. Sometimes I think about cautions like what if the person on the other line is lying to me, or what if the person on the other line is saying what they are told to? Those things like that that people can somehow tolerate to hear.

I know people laugh at me when I try to answer them as much honesty as I could. It sometimes hurts that they do not care to believe me, but that’s okay. I know phone anxiety is not a joke, and it deals with an overwhelming component related to social anxiety, deep emotional issues, childhood trauma, and unrealistic fears.

So if you are a person like me who struggles to find answers to their somehow “laughable” phone anxiety, give these answered frequently asked questions a shot. They might hold the solution for our mental health issue.

How do I overcome Phone anxiety?

To help yourself overcome phone anxiety, try concentrating on creating a purpose for the call. Instead of being more concerned about what might go wrong, concentrate on the main reason for your call. Be open with the fact that something is always unexpected. News and information you may get might not be the one you want to hear, so bear that in your mind. If you want consistency, write a script and practice it. Be interested and show interest in the person you are on call with.

Why does calling give me anxiety?

Much of our apprehension in making calls is rooted in being misconstrued or unintentionally hurting someone’s feelings. In face-to-face interactions, there are other hints that we can get signs from if our message or voice call does not succeed.

Sometimes the anxiety of making a call is not because you are afraid to talk to someone, but rather you want to be too cautious about the things that you are not supposed to say over the phone.

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How can I stop being scared of anxiety?

Confront your anxieties and fears so that these do not debilitate you. Find smarter means to develop techniques on how to control and master how to deal with your life—practice stress reduction strategies, like exercise, deep breathing, and meditation. Change your mindset to the positive things and views in life.

How can I kill anxiety naturally?

Live a healthier and anxiety-free life through these strategies:

  • Avoid clutter. Organize your home.
  • Humidify your room with lavender to help you relax.
  • Meditate regularly.
  • It is always best to sleep early and get sufficient amounts of sleep daily.
  • Take care of yourself.
  • Don’t consume too much caffeine, processed foods, and sugar.

 Can anxiety be cured completely?

Anxiety is not completely curable. It is because an individual’s inclination towards anxiety is innate, one that is part of his heredity and something that no medication or other treatment can completely get rid of. Hence, we can say that anxiety, indeed, cannot be cured completely.

How long will anxiety last?

Anxiety is frequently associated with a certain situation. It typically builds up and lingers for some time. Panic attacks begin abruptly, with symptoms peaking just after 10 minutes from their onset. It usually subsides after 30 minutes or longer for some people. On the other hand, Generalized anxiety disorder, which is characterized by excessive worry or anxiety, exists for at least six months.

Can anxiety go away with time?

Some anxiety episodes are shorter than others, progressing from several minutes to several days. However, some people claim that their anxious feelings are more than just mere worries or stressful moments. And during these times, the anxiety may not subside for months or even years.

What vitamins help with anxiety?

Multivitamins, omega-3, L-theanine, magnesium, vitamin D, and vitamin B complex are some of the popular vitamins and supplements that reduce anxiety.

Which fruit is good for anxiety?

When you suddenly begin to feel anxious, think of citrus fruits, like oranges. These can tremendously help reduce your anxiety. Studies have found that adding oranges to your diet significantly aids in producing relaxation, calmness, and a better mindset.

Can you beat anxiety without medication?

Anxiety is a monster, but it is not impossible to overcome your struggle without taking any medication. At times, getting rid of nervousness and worry is merely a matter of changing your thoughts, lifestyle, and behavior. You can begin your therapy without taking medications and then consult your doctor about it if your anxiety symptoms persist or perhaps get worse.

Does CBD help anxiety?

CBD is widely utilized for anxiety alleviation. Studies reveal that CBD helps with falling asleep and staying asleep for individuals who struggle with insomnia. CBD can also help treat various kinds of chronic pain.

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How do you calm an overwhelmed mind?

The next time you desperately need to calm yourself down, consider concentrating on your breathing. Take deep and slow breaths. Also, acknowledge your feelings of anger or anxiety. Challenge your negative thoughts and learn to release these negative emotions. Always think things through before even acting on them so you can visualize calm you. It would also help to listen to soothing and relaxing music as it can change your mindset.

What is a drug that calms you down?

The most widely prescribed anti-anxiety medications for instant relief are medicines that are called benzodiazepines. These include alprazolam (Xanax), chlordiazepoxide (Librium), Lorazepam (Ativan), and diazepam (Valium), among others.


Frequently Asked Questions About The Study Of Sleep

Are you stressed out and having trouble with sleeping?

A lot of people compromise their sleep to have more time for other areas of their lives. More often than not, bad quality sleep is caused by overwhelming stress—whether it be from our jobs, studies, families, or other responsibilities.

That’s why paying attention to sleep might be the solution you need to manage your stress and rest better.

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The role of sleep in our well-being is much more important than you might think. While it’s sure that sleep is essential to life, there’s no absolute reason behind the phenomenon. So why exactly do we need to sleep?

Several theories explain why we sleep, and one of these is the adaptive theory of sleep. This theory argues that humans and animals evolved unique sleeping patterns to avoid being present during their predators’ hunting times.

On the one hand, predators do not worry about being vulnerable at night, so they sleep longer during the day. On the other hand, humans and prey are typically asleep at night and for shorter periods.

Another theory of sleep is the restorative theory. This theory states that sleep is needed because it allows for replenishing necessary nutrients and repairing bodily damages. Sleep is also said to facilitate brain plasticity and memory formation.

No one theory is more accurate than the other. Both the adaptive theory and restorative theory are used in understanding the mechanisms of sleep. Nevertheless, sleep is an essential part of life. Not being mindful of it will have serious consequences on our health.

Without realizing it, sleep deprivation is especially common among people with demanding lifestyles, such as students, parents, and working individuals.

Chronic sleep deprivation can significantly increase an individual’s risk for illnesses such as heart disease, hypertension, depression, and stroke. A few nights of poor sleep can seriously affect physical and mental functioning.

If you find yourself constantly sleep-deprived, know that you can still do something about it. Read the full article to learn how to rest better and other frequently asked questions about sleep.

What are the 5 types of sleep disorders?

The five types of sleep disorder are:

  1. sleep apnea
  2. insomnia
  3. restless legs syndrome
  4. narcolepsy
  5. REM sleep behavior disorder

The symptoms of these conditions can make patients feel irritable and exhausted. As a result, it can significantly affect their daily activities and relationships. Fortunately, there are treatments available for these sleep disorders.

How much does a sleep psychologist make?

According to data, a sleep psychologist makes around $60,000 to $80,000 annually. The average salary varies depending on experience, company, location, and benefits.

A sleep psychologist also earns from research grants and conducting talks. Overall, how much a sleep psychologist makes is highly similar to that of a licensed psychologist.

Why is sleep so important in psychology?

Sleep is crucial in psychology because it affects our overall well-being, from physical, emotional, to mental health. Sufficient sleep restores the brain. It also helps regulate essential bodily functions.

On the other hand, sleep deprivation can cause risks. Lack of sleep can result in heart disease, high blood pressure, depression, stroke, etc. It can also extend to frequent mood changes, poor work performance, and relationship problems.

Ultimately, sleep deprivation affects the overall well-being.

What are the stages of sleep psychology?

Rapid eye movement (REM) sleep and non-REM sleep are the basic types of sleep stages. They link to specific neuronal activities. Here are the stages of sleep psychology:

  • Non-REM Sleep Stage 1: This is the short transition from wakefulness to sleep. It is where you will experience a slowing of breath, heartbeat, and movements.
  • Non-REM Sleep Stage 2: This is the light sleep phase that occurs before deep sleep. At this point, the body slowly relaxes.
  • Non-REM Sleep Stage 3: This is the deep sleep phase. It is where your breathing and heartbeat are at their lowest levels.
  • REM Sleep: This happens around 90 minutes after you fall asleep. Here, your eyes rapidly move from side-to-side while your eyelids are closed.

Why is it harder to sleep as we age?

It is normal to experience changes in sleeping patterns, including experiencing lighter sleep. You may also wake up more often and more quickly. It is also possible to experience lesser deep sleep. However, symptoms of disturbed sleep and insomnia are not a part of aging.

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How do I get more deep sleep?

The most crucial step in increasing your deep sleep is having enough sleep. To do this, you should have a regular bedtime schedule. Set a time for you to go to sleep and wake up. It would also help to avoid drinking caffeine before bed as it makes it harder to fall asleep.

Some research says that exercise and aerobic activities can consolidate deep sleep. Experts suggest that it’s better to exercise during the day.

What is the deepest stage of sleep psychology?

The deepest sleep psychology stage is stage three of non-REM sleep. It lasts around 20 to 40 minutes. Sometimes, it’s also called slow-wave sleep. During this time, there is an increase in the delta brain activity. It is also the stage where you are the hardest to wake up.

How long does it take to go into a deep sleep?

It takes around 90 minutes after falling asleep to enter REM sleep. It lasts for about an hour. The deep sleep in this process lasts approximately 20 to 40 minutes. This cycle repeats up to three to four times every sleep.

What causes no deep sleep?

Deep sleep deprivation can happen because of many possible causes. It includes a weakened sleep drive, poor sleep habits, substance use, medications, and other conditions. If not addressed, lack of deep sleep can lead to severe sleep disorders.

Should I stay up all night if I can’t sleep?

It’s not advisable to stay up all night when you can’t sleep. Otherwise, it becomes highly likely for your mood and mental function to decline the next day.

If you can’t sleep, experts suggest staying out of bed for around 30 minutes. Then, go back to bed once you start to feel drowsy and sleep. As a result, you’ll be able to fall asleep faster.

How can I sleep deeply without medicine?

Many people rely on sleep medications to have a deep sleep. However, heavy dependence on these medication aids can make your sleep cycle worse.

You can try to sleep deeply by developing good sleep hygiene. These are set habits that you can do before bedtime for a better and deeper sleep.

It includes establishing a regular sleep schedule, getting adequate natural daylight exposure, exercising, taking a warm bath before bed, preparing a pleasant sleep environment, and more.

Paying attention to sleep hygiene facilitates healthy sleep. However, it can’t be used as a single cure for more serious sleeping disorders such as insomnia.

Good sleeping habits are just not enough to solve the root cause of the insomnia problem. Instead, sleep psychologist Dr. Jade Wu offers two ways to manipulate biological and psychological processes to address insomnia.

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First, she suggests building up your sleep drive. Sleep drive is essentially like hunger for your sleep. People with insomnia often don’t have enough sleep drive when they go to bed. They might have slept in, took naps, or weren’t that active during the day.

If you relate to this, you can build up your sleep drive by:

  • getting up at the same time every day (even if you didn’t sleep well the previous night);
  • not going to bed until you’re sleepy; and,
  • not taking naps during the day.

Second, Dr. Wu suggests retraining your brain. People with insomnia typically get the “busy” brain whenever they lie down in bed and try to sleep. Lying down in bed then becomes the brain’s cue to be hyperactive. You can break this connection through these methods:

  • Don’t go to bed unless you’re sleepy.
  • If you’re starting to fret or you can’t fall asleep after around 20-30 minutes, get out of bed.
  • Don’t track the clock if 20 or 30 minutes have already passed.

Another factor that influences our sleep quality is our stress levels. When not managed properly, stress can easily cause poor sleep and even sleepless nights.

To prevent feeling overly stressed out when you’re about to sleep, you can invoke the body’s natural relaxation response. You can do this by practicing relaxation techniques such as:

  • meditation (mindfulness, body scan, or guided meditation),
  • deep breathing,
  • progressive relaxation, and
  • biofeedback.

Remember that sleeping is just as important as fitness and nutrition in the maintenance of our health. Hopefully, you can use this article’s contents to improve your sleep quality and live your healthiest life.